Disclaimer

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Dana walks into Dan's office.

Dana: Danny, I was wondering...

Dana sees Dan on the couch and reading a book.

Dana: What are you reading?

Dan: Casey's book.

Dana: How is it?

Dan: It's good. It isn't Byron, but it's good.

Dana: Good. Good.

Dan: I've talked with Casey.

Dana: About?

Dan: You not getting a copy of the book.

Dana: Why? How did you know?

Dan: Natalie told me.

Dana: Oh. Never mind.

Dan: Casey is going to resolve the situation.

Dana: There is nothing to resolve.

Dan: Now you're just confusing me.

Dana: Don't worry about all that. I need you to put together something on Arizona and Arizona State.

Dan: College football?

Dana: Yeah.

Dan: Okay.

-----

Jeremy is in the editing room. Casey knocks on the door and enters.

Jeremy: Hey, Casey.

Casey: Hey, Jeremy.

Jeremy: What brings you here today?

Casey: A number of things, one being a new top ten list.

Jeremy: What are you- Letterman?

Casey: No. I'm putting together a top ten list of movies all-time.

Jeremy: Your top ten list?

Casey: Yeah.

Jeremy: Because they normally hold that honor for movie critics, people who get paid to watch movies.

Casey: I was asked to put together this list, and I just wanted you to look over it.

Jeremy: Sure.

Casey hands Jeremy his list. Jeremy looks over the list.

Casey: So what do you think?

Jeremy: You do realize you have "Breakfast at Tiffany's" between "Rocky III" and "Major League"?

Casey: I haven't put them in order, yet. I've just picked my favorite ten.

Jeremy: Okay. I'm surprised you have a lot of chick flicks on here.

Casey: What do you mean?

Jeremy: Actually, most of these are chick flicks.

Casey: They are not.

Jeremy: You asked for my opinion.

Casey: I did. I did, indeed.

Jeremy: There's nothing wrong with chick flicks. I'm just surprised you would list that many of them.

Casey: Give me back my list.

Casey grabs the list from Jeremy.

Jeremy: Nice seeing you, Casey.

Casey: See you later.

Casey leaves the editing room.

-----

Elliott, Dana, and Isaac are sitting in Isaac's office.

Isaac: After much thought, we would like to offer you the position of associate producer.

Dana: Congratulations, Elliott.

Elliott: Thank you.

Isaac: So do you need some time to think about it?

Elliott: A little bit.

Isaac: Okay. It sounds like you have reservations.

Elliott: Maybe.

Dana: What's wrong?

Elliott: You need to promise me one thing.

Isaac: What's that?

Elliott: You don't morph me into somebody that's not me.

Dana: What?

Isaac: Do you think we're going to change your body? Change you into something else?

Dana: Like a plant or a table?

Elliott: No. I don't want you to change my personality- make me different from what I am now.

Isaac: Well, we do want you to change.

Dana: In a positive way.

Elliott: I don't know...

Isaac: We want you to do well in this job. We're not putting you into a position to fail. We feel you are the best person for this job.

Elliott: But you're not going to take me away from my friends?

Dana: We are your friends.

Elliott: See?

Isaac leans back in his chair and looks at Elliott. He leans forward and chuckles.

Isaac: Do you think we are going to change your values and personality?

Elliott: Maybe.

Isaac: Your values and personality helped land you this job. Also your experience and work ethic. I want you to be you, Elliott.

Elliott: Thank you.

Isaac: People shouldn't have to change their core values because they got promoted. I need people who can stand on their own and help this show.

Elliott: Thank you, Isaac.

Dana: Would you like some time to think about it?

Elliott: I'll let you know tomorrow.

Isaac stands up.

Isaac: Good. We'll get your answer tomorrow.

Isaac and Elliott shake hands.

-----

Dan is sitting in his chair and looking over a list.

Dan: There's a lot of chick flicks on this list.

Casey: Hey. I didn't ask for an evaluation. I'm just wondering if there are any movies I may have overlooked.

Dan: Yeah, but I'm not going to change your list for you. These are your favorite movies.

Casey: I know. They're going to be plastered all over the place. This is a nationwide promotion by a national chain.

Dan: I'll admit that I do like this one: "An Affair to Remember."

Casey: Good.

Dan: It is a chick flick, though.

Casey: A very good one, Danny. It's a very good movie.

Dan: I see... it's the wheelchair, isn't it?

Casey: It is just good, Danny! If not for the plot, the story, the production... it does have one of the most important elements that mark the development of the entertainment industry as we know it.

Dan: Which is?

Casey: Witty dialog!

Dan: Witty dialog. A very important element.

Casey: A crucial element, my friend. Crucial.

Dan: "Breakfast at Tiffany's." Another chick flick.

Casey: So?

Dan: It's an undeniable fact, Casey, "Breakfast at Tiffany's" is a movie directed to the female audience in general. It's soft, sweet, full of dialog, full of feelings... chick flick.

Casey: Well, it's an old movie.

Dan: An old chick flick. Don't get me wrong. It's a good movie... nice, well acted, interesting, but still... a chick flick.

Casey: Well, I agree with you, but there's one thing. That movie has the most beautiful woman in the world acting in it.

Dan: Audrey Hepburn is, indeed, the most beautiful woman in the world.

Casey: Darn right she is.

Dan: You realize, Audrey Hepburn could be your grandmother, right Casey?

Casey: I do, but... she's still the most beautiful woman in the world.

Dan: And she's in all the classic chick movies.

Casey: That too.

Dana walks into the office.

Dana: Well... good to see you two chummies here today.

Casey: I just stopped by to have Danny look over my list.

Dana: I can't look over your list?

Casey: I had Jeremy and Dave look over it, also.

Dana: So Jeremy and Dave take precedence over me?

Casey: You were busy. I was going to come to you with this list.

Dana: When?

Casey: How about... now?

Dana: Oh. I'm busy.

Casey: I'm digging myself into a hole and I don't know why.

Dana: You know darn well why.

Casey: Danny? Could you leave me and Dana for a minute?

Dan: It's my office.

Casey: It used to be my office, too.

Dan: Actually, your office was down the hall. You just happened to work in my office.

Casey: Danny...

Dan: Okay. But if anything is damaged...

Casey: We'll be extra careful. We'll only throw pillows.

Dan leaves the office.

Dana: What did you want to talk about?

Casey: Okay, let's talk about the book.

Dana: What book?

Casey: My book.

Dana: You wrote a book?

Casey: Dana.

Dana: Because if you had written a book, I would have at least received a copy of it.

Casey: You were busy.

Dana: Not busy enough to get your book.

Casey: Hold on a minute. You've been working six and seven days a week and you've been extremely busy. I asked you if you were going to have time to read my book, and you said 'I don't even have time to breathe.'

Dana: I did say that, didn't I?

Casey: So why should I give you a copy when you are not going to have time to read it? I would at least like you to read my book.

Dana: Casey.

Casey: You can't sweet talk me on this one.

Dana: You have to understand something.

Casey: I'll try.

Dana: Just because I don't have time to read your book, it doesn't mean I wouldn't appreciate receiving an advanced copy.

Casey: You would just let it collect dust?

Dana: It's the gesture, Casey. It doesn't have anything to do with reading the book. You only received a few copies, and if you gave me one, I would feel loved and appreciated.

Casey: I do love and appreciate you.

Dana: You can show it through little gestures.

Casey walks over and kisses Dana on the forehead.

Casey: Like that?

Dana: Yes.

Casey: You're crazy, you know that?

Dana: But you still love me, don't you?

Casey and Dana smile and embrace.

Dana: Tell me one thing. Why are you doing this movie list again?

Casey: My publicist said it would be good publicity with the release of my book.

Dana: Am I hearing this straight?

Casey: I think so.

Dana: You're doing a movie list to be posted in a national chain.

Casey: Yeah.

Dana: People are renting movies, while you are trying to promote your book.

Casey: Uh... yeah.

Dana: So by encouraging them to read your book, you are telling them to rent more movies- in fact, your favorite movies of all time.

Casey: Yeah, I guess.

Dana: Wouldn't it make more sense to have a top ten list of your favorite books and have them advertised at a nationwide book store chain?

Casey: Well... I'm just trying to generate some publicity.

Dana: Okay. See ya'.

Dana leaves the office while Casey looks confused.

-----

Elliott, Chris, Will, and Dave are seated around a table at a bar.

Chris: So, it's going to work out?

Elliott: I'm letting them know tomorrow.

Will: Everything's cool?

Elliott: As a cucumber.

Dave: You know something? We need to get back at Kim for saying all those nasty things about us.

Elliott: What do you have in mind?

Dave: I was thinking of gluing down her pens and pencils in her drawer.

Chris: We could fix her computer so it cuts off frequently.

Will: Better yet, we could change the labels on her tapes.

Everyone agrees with Will's idea.

Elliott: Things will never change between us.

The waiter drops off the bill. Dave passes the bill to Elliott.

Elliott: What's this?

Dave: You're making the big bucks now. You can pick up the tab.

Chris and Will nod in agreement.

-----

Natalie walks into Dana's office.

Natalie: You wanted to see me?

Dana: Yeah. We finally got a solution to your chair problem.

Natalie: I can live with it.

Dana: Here is what we got you.

Dana puts a bag on her desk and pulls out a chair pad.

Natalie: Your solution is a chair pad?

Dana: Yes. Tape down the spring and put this on your seat. You'll be ready to go.

Natalie: All the budget could afford was a five dollar seat cushion?

Dana: Actually, it's $11.98.

Natalie: Big spender.

Dana: Here ya' go.

Dana tosses Natalie the cushion.

Natalie: Honestly, I can live with the spring. I've adjusted to it, and it is not necessary for me to have a cushion.

Dana: But... you complained about it... why?

Natalie: I looked at the big picture and determined that I can sacrifice a little comfort for the good of the show.

Dana: Huh?

There is a knock on Dana's door.

Dana: Come in. We're not done with this, Natalie.

Jeremy walks in.

Jeremy: Hey, Dana.

Dana: Hey Jeremy. What's up?

Jeremy: I understand small budget approvals need to go through you.

Dana: What is it?

Jeremy: It's my chair again.

Dana: What?

Dana starts looking toward Natalie. Natalie has a look of innocence.

Dana: Go on.

Jeremy: I'm getting another spring popping up near the back. It's almost in the same spot as the last one.

Dana: You don't say?

Jeremy: And I don't think I'm getting fat, either. Granted, I haven't been working out over the past few months, but I don't think my weight on the chair would be causing the seat to fail.

Dana: Well, were going to have to... wait a second... you have the same weight as when you were working out?

Jeremy: Yeah.

Dana: So you don't have to run or do aerobics or lift weights to keep that same figure?

Jeremy: I was blessed with good metabolism.

Dana: You're saying you don't have to do anything to keep your weight down?

Jeremy: No. What is this about?

Dana: Give it to him, Natalie.

Natalie thumps the chair pad into Jeremy's chest.

Dana: Here's a chair pad. It's all the budget can afford.