The Boys From Syracuse

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Kim and Jeremy are walking through the newsroom.

Jeremy: What do you mean we have to drive?

Kim: It's the new policy. Any assignment that is less than 300 miles away, you have to drive to it.

Jeremy: We could fly to Buffalo.

Kim: It's over 300 miles.

Jeremy: Syracuse is practically next door.

Kim: It's under 300 miles.

Jeremy: So we have to drive?

Kim: Actually... you, Marcus, and Phil have to drive. I get to stay here.

Jeremy: Ah. The joy of being executive producer of your own show.

Kim: It's one of the perks.

Kim and Jeremy split up. Jeremy shakes his head and goes to his desk. Marcus approaches from behind.

Marcus: What's the word, my good man?

Jeremy: We're driving there.

Marcus: Cool.

Jeremy: No, it's not cool. I'll be driving couped-up in a network van with you and Phil for five hours. And not to mention the toll booths.

Marcus: Kim isn't going to let us fly?

Jeremy: No... and you'd think with Phil on her team, she would be willing to do us a favor.

Marcus: Well, Dana said we had to drive.

Jeremy: You see? You're missing the point.

Marcus: Where are the keys?

Jeremy: I've got them.

Marcus: Can I drive?

Jeremy: No.

Marcus: Oh, come on, Jeremy.

Jeremy: I already know the route. I'll drive.

Marcus: Why did you memorize the route if you thought we would be flying?

Jeremy: Driving was Plan B.

Marcus: Always be prepared?

Jeremy: Yeah, really.

Dana and Natalie walk by Jeremy and Marcus.

Dana: Let's go, gentlemen. Afternoon practice is at 4, which leaves you less than 6 hours to get there.

Jeremy: It would be easier if we were flying.

Dana: Yes, it would... wouldn't it?

Jeremy: Easy for you to say. You don't have to be cramped up like a sardine in a tin can for five hours- and that's only in one direction.

Natalie: You could always pay for the plane ticket out of your own pocket.

Jeremy: Natalie.

Natalie: Hey, don't blame me. It was just a suggestion. Anyway, it's Dana's fault.

Dana: Don't pin this on me. It's outlined in company policy... anything under 300 miles-

Jeremy: I got it.

Elliott walks up to Dana.

Elliott: Dana. This just came for you.

Elliott hands Dana an envelope and then he walks off.

Dana: It's here!

Natalie: What?

Dana: My tickets!

Jeremy: I guess we'll be going.

Natalie: We'll see you around ten.

Jeremy pulls out the keys and jingles them in the air.

Jeremy: (sarcastic) A full tank of gas, a new set of wheels, a stereo system, and we're ready to roll on the open highway.

Dana stares at the envelope.

Dana: I can't believe they actually came.

Natalie: Good luck, guys.

Marcus and Jeremy leave. Dana starts walking toward her office, still mesmerized by the envelope. Natalie races to catch up.

Natalie: What did you get?

Dana: Shhh... In my office.

Dana and Natalie walk quietly and unnoticed into Dana's office. Natalie closes the door behind her.

Natalie: Okay. Fess up.

Dana rips open the envelope and pulls out four tickets.

Dana: I can't believe it. I actually got tickets.

Natalie: I see that.

Dana: Section C, Row 16, Seats A, B, C, and D.

Natalie: To what? The Giants? The Knicks? The Rangers?

Dana: 'The Producers.'

Natalie: What?! Not the-

Dana: Yes. 'The Producers.'

Natalie: Let me see those.

Natalie reaches for the tickets, but Dana pulls them away.

Dana: Don't touch.

Natalie: Can't I just look at them?

Dana: Ummm... okay. But only look at them.

Dana shows Natalie the tickets.

Natalie: Who are you taking?

Dana: Well, there's me and Casey.

Natalie: Yes.

Dana gives Natalie a sympathetic look.

Dana: And I was thinking...

Natalie: You're not inviting me?

Dana: Well...

Natalie: That's fine. Who else are you taking?

Dana: I'm sorry, Natalie. I was thinking of taking Dan and JoAnne. Next time, Natalie.

Natalie: That's okay. I'm fine.

Dana: You're upset.

Natalie: I am not upset.

Dana: I just know that Dan really, really wants to see this.

Natalie: No problem.

Dana: And plus, Dan and Casey don't get to see each other as much anymore.

Natalie: It's not a problem, Dana. Michael and I have a lot of other Broadway productions we can attend.

Dana: And I don't want you thinking that this is payback for not backing me up on the Sam issue.

Natalie: Timeout. Am I supposed to get payback?

Dana: No, and I don't want you to think that this is payback.

Natalie: Because there shouldn't be any sort of payback here.

Dana: Good. We agree.

Natalie: I would just think you would invite Michael and me before you would invite Dan and his floozy.

Dana: JoAnne is not a floozy.

Natalie: Do you hang out with her? How do you know she's not some crazed lunatic who has hypnotized Dan into being her love slave?

Dana: JoAnne's not like that.

Natalie: How do you know?

Dana: Granted, JoAnne and I don't hang out, but it is good for me to go out and get to know other people.

Natalie: Okay.

Dana: And I'll let you know if she is a crazed lunatic.

Natalie: Oh, I already know she's not.

Dana: What-

Natalie: Jeremy hangs out with her, and he told me everything already.

Dana: That's good to know.

Natalie: Tell me about it. I wouldn't want my boyfriend... ex-boyfriend... hanging out with someone like that.

Dana: But it's alright now?

Natalie: Why should I care? It's not like I still own Jeremy's cute little butt.

Dana: Natalie-

Natalie: I'm joking, Dana. Ha-ha... hardee-har.

Dana: So you understand that me not inviting you isn't a slight toward you.

Natalie: Absolutely.

Dana: Natalie, have I ever told you how wonderful you are?

Natalie: Yes, you have. But it doesn't hurt to hear it over and over again.

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JoAnne is working on Dan's computer in his office.

JoAnne: I cannot fathom how you are able to break your laptop all the time.

Dan: I was hoping I could get one of those steel-encased computers.

JoAnne: Well, I'll have to see what I can do. What are we doing on Friday night?

Dan: Dana is taking care of the plans.

JoAnne: Dana?

Dan: Yeah. She and Casey are coming along. She's picking the event; I'm picking the restaurant.

JoAnne: We're going on a double-date?

Dan: Yes, it will be fun.

JoAnne: This is a first.

Dan: We've gone out and socialized with all your friends.

JoAnne: Melanie, Paula, and Cathy do not count as a double-date.

Dan: You don't hear me objecting.

JoAnne gets up and places a hand on Dan's chest.

JoAnne: Where are we going to eat?

Dan: It depends... on where...

JoAnne flashes a smile.

JoAnne: Yeah?

Dan: Dana is taking care of the plans.

JoAnne: Good.

JoAnne grabs her tools and starts heading out the door.

JoAnne: If it's something really good, I might have to get a new dress.

Dan: Really?

JoAnne: If it's really good.

Dan: Okay.

JoAnne heads into the newsroom as Dan tries to compose himself.

Dan: Dana?!

Dan heads out of the office.

-----

There is a knock on Dana's door.

Dana: Yeah?

Dan walks in.

Dan: Hey.

Dana sets a folder down and takes off her glasses.

Dana: Hey. Everything all right with the NLCS?

Dan: Yeah. Perfect. The Braves and somebody playing baseball.

Dana: Oh that's good.

Dan: I've got one thing.

Dana: What's that? Who the Braves are playing?

Dan: No. Where are we going on Friday?

Dana: Huh?

Dan: Where are we going on Friday?

Dana: Do you really want to know?

Dan: Yes.

Dana: Really want to know?

Dan goes over to Dana's desk, gets down on his knees, and begins to beg.

Dan: Yes. Please stop teasing me. I beg of you.

Dana smiles, then opens her drawer. She slowly pulls out some tickets and shows them to Dan. Dan stares at them in disbelief.

Dana: Happy?

Dan: Yes.

Dana: You don't sound happy.

Dan jumps up.

Dan: Yes! I mean... I am happy! Very happy! 'The Producers'?

Dana: Yes, I thought you would like it.

Dan: I thought there would be a huge waiting list.

Dana: There was, but I got lucky. Somebody had to cancel.

Dan: Wait... we're all sitting together, right?

Dana: Of course.

Dan: Because if we weren't, I'd be all right with that, too.

Dana: What? Do you think I would get four individual seats with each of us sitting in separate corners?

Dan: I said I'm all right with that.

Dana: It says Seats A, B, C, and D.

Dan: Dana, I could kiss you right now.

Dana: That's quite all right, Dan.

Dan begins to leave, stops, and goes back to Dana. He places a big kiss on her cheek. Dana smiles.

Dana: Thank you.

Dan: No, thank you.

Dan leaves the office, then comes back in.

Dan: It's the Braves and Diamondbacks, right?

Dana: Right.

-----

Jeremy, Marcus, and Phil are walking alongside a practice field. The Syracuse football team is in the midst of warming up. Jeremy is carrying a backpack and walking rather stiff. Marcus is carrying a notebook, while Phil is carrying a video camera and a folded tripod.

Marcus: Dude, you need to exercise more.

Jeremy: I've been in one position for the last five hours. How would your joints react?

Marcus: Just fine.

Marcus starts to dance.

Jeremy: You could pass as a member of the Syracuse dance team.

Marcus: Thanks.

Jeremy: It wasn't meant as a compliment.

Phil: Where do you want to set up?

Jeremy scans the field.

Jeremy: Let's set up over there.

Marcus: I'll go talk with Bradley.

Jeremy: Great.

Marcus trots off as Jeremy and Phil begin setting up the camera.

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The Syracuse football team breaks their huddle.

Coach Bradley: First teams! Seven-on-seven for twenty minutes! Wilson! Any late hits and I'll bust your chops! Dammit! I said first teams now!

Marcus walks up to Coach Bradley.

Marcus: Mr. Bradley? I'm Marcus-

Coach Bradley: No autographs, son.

Marcus: Oh, I'm not-

Coach Bradley: And it's Coach Bradley, son.

Marcus: I'm sorry, sir. I'm with CSC.

Coach Bradley blows his whistle.

Coach Bradley: (toward the field) Dammit, Ortego! You're holdin' like you're latching onto your momma'!

Bradley looks over Marcus.

Coach Bradley: You're with CSC? (laughs) Whatever you say. Security let you through, so you're here.

Marcus shows Bradley his badge.

Marcus: We're going to get some shots of Scoggins during the drills to do some background. We're going to mix it with some game footage-

Coach Bradley: I don't know what the hell you're talkin' about, son. Do your job, then get the hell out.

Marcus: Alright. Cool. When can I talk with Darryll?

Coach Bradley: Scoggins? Cause I've got at least three Darrylls on the team.

Marcus: Yes, sir. When may I talk with Darryll Scoggins?

Coach Bradley: Well, not during practice. You can talk with him afterwards in the training room.

Marcus: Great. Thanks.

Bradley blows his whistle again.

-----

Jeremy is watching practice while Phil is filming it.

Jeremy: We need to move.

Phil: I'm just going prop this on my shoulder.

Jeremy: We're too far away. Let's move down.

Phil takes the camera off the tripod and puts it on his shoulder.

 

Good play, guys! Huddle up, huddle up!

Come on, D! Don't let them beat you!

Jeremy: I'm thinking we could get right to the line of scrimmage. We'll get better shots of Scoggins there.

The offense runs a pass play away from Jeremy and Phil.

Phil: Marcus is over there. He's with some guy in a suit.

Jeremy looks over.

Jeremy: It looks like Burt Richardson, the assistant A.D.

 

Down! Set! Hut! Hut!

Phil: Is this close enough?

Jeremy: Yeah. This is good.

 

Hurry up! Hurry up! Spread Blue 943!

Phil stops walking and starts filming.

Jeremy: I need to let Marcus know we're over here.

Jeremy starts waving his arms.

Phil: You're picking up in the audio.

Jeremy: Sorry, I'll just be a second. Marcus!

Phil: Jer-

 

Hut!

GRRR! PA-POP! POP! OO-UH! OOOFF! CRINKLE!

Jeremy is knocked to the ground by a swarm of orange and blue jerseys. This is the end result of a play- one in which everyone escapes unscathed, except for Jeremy.

"You alright, bud?"

"Dude? You okay?"

Jeremy: Huh? Yeah. I'm fine.

Jeremy sits on the ground.

"Ball?"

Jeremy looks down and sees the football next to him.

Jeremy: Sure.

Jeremy chucks the football lopsided to a player.

Phil: Jeremy? You okay.

Jeremy: I'm fine. Just help me up.

Phil lends Jeremy a hand and helps him up.

Jeremy: See? I'm just fine.

Jeremy rolls his head and crumples back to the ground.

-----

In the newsroom, Natalie is putting a gauze bandage on Jeremy's forehead. Chris, Will, and Dave watch.

Chris: Does it hurt?

Jeremy: Yes.

Natalie: Stop shifting.

Jeremy: I'm not moving.

Will: Now let me get this straight. You suffered the cut when they hit you?

Chris: The hit didn't cause the cut. It was after he got up. He fainted and hit his head.

Jeremy: Guys? Do we have to go over this?

Dave: Actually, it happened the second time he fainted.

Will snaps his fingers.

Will: That's right. When one of the players started bleeding-

Chris: He fainted at the sight of blood.

Jeremy: Thanks for reminding me.

Natalie: All done.

Jeremy: It doesn't feel right.

Natalie: It looks good to me.

Jeremy: I need a mirror.

Natalie: Jeremy- it looks good.

Dave: She did a nice job.

Natalie: (to Dave) Thank you. (to Jeremy) You need to stop complaining.

Jeremy: I'm not complaining.

Natalie: You've been whining and complaining over everything the last few weeks. I've been changing your bandage twice-a-day since yesterday, and you haven't even been happy with that.

Jeremy: I've had minor objections. It's logical for people to not always agree on everything.

Natalie: Jeremy? If you were wearing a diaper, you'd be asking me to change it.

Elliott: Guys?

Elliott joins the group.

Elliott: We've got problems. Burt Richardson wants to talk to somebody in charge.

Natalie: From Syracuse?

Elliott: Yeah. He doesn't sound happy.

Everyone looks at Natalie.

Natalie: I'll get Isaac.

Natalie starts heading toward Isaac's office.

Elliott: He's on line three.

Natalie: Thanks.

-----

Isaac hangs up the phone on his desk. Natalie stands quietly and holds her clipboard.

Isaac: We are being banned from covering Syracuse football. Our press passes are being revoked.

Natalie: If it's something Jeremy said-

Isaac: Jeremy didn't say anything to upset them.

Natalie: Then what happened?

Isaac: It seems that Coach Bradley was watching the segment last night.

Natalie: Yeah. So?

Isaac: One clip shows Scoggins rolling out of the pocket to his right and throwing a pass. Bradley claims the clip is showing a new play for their offense. Also in the story, Marcus mentions the possibility of Syracuse using a spread offense.

Natalie: I don't understand.

Isaac: Bradley says they haven't used a spread offense all season. He went after Burt Richardson, and because Richardson let us film and do the segment, we're being suspended for the rest of the season.

Natalie: They can't do that.

Dana walks into the office.

Dana: What's going on?

Natalie: Syracuse is suspending our media privileges.

Dana: They can't do that, can they, Isaac?

Isaac: Richardson is very upset, and I'm not surprised.

Natalie: You're not going to let them go through with this, are you?

Isaac: I'm going to let the situation simmer down before making an attempt to regain our privileges.

Dana: They're playing in three days. How long do you want to wait?

Isaac: I want to wait until tomorrow. Dana? I want you to handle the negotiations.

Dana: Me?

Isaac: Yes, you.

Dana: But they wanted to deal with somebody in charge.

Isaac: You managed to get deal done before. I trust you can accomplish this again.

Dana: I don't have anything to offer them.

Isaac: Let's start with an apology.

Dana: Okay. Natalie?

Natalie: Right here.

Dana: Make sure we have the segment pulled from all future broadcasts, including the college football pregame show. We can't go back and edit the segments which have already aired. Have Marcus recut and edit out the offending pieces.

Natalie: Got it.

Dana: Isaac? Should we let them see it before we air it?

Isaac: Why?

Dana: So we don't offend Bradley, Richardson, or anybody else.

Isaac: If we cut out the play and the voice-over, why would they be offended?

Dana: So that's a 'no.'

Isaac pounds his fist into his desk.

Isaac: A resounding one.

Dana: Great.



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